Ask The Celebration Advisor: Hi: Regarding Party Favors at a reception only event.

I have a cousin, who just told the bride, that there is a new trend in party favors.  In lieu of giving out party favors, the couple "donate to their favorite charity"

I am questioning this, because, first and foremost, this relative is NOT a wedding planner, nor does she have any background in weddings other then being a "guest."

I desperately need your advice, because the bride is from another country and has selected this "relative" to be her "wedding planner"

HELP  Helen from Los Angeles Ca

Many many thanks.

PS:  We are a American-Japanese family.  And I know that most of the relatives will be expecting a "token" favor.

The Celebration Advisor:

Donating to a charity is a very admirable thing to do.  Many couples are choosing to forgo the wedding party favors in lieu of a charitable donation.  While wedding favors are not a requirement, many couples give favors as a way to thank guests for participating in their day.  Many cultures believe the bride and groom must give guests a token of their appreciation.  Therefore the culture of the families involved dictates the proper etiquette concerning wedding favors.  For example, in Mediterranean countries the wedding favors are Jordon almonds which represent the bitter and sweet sides of marriage.

In the Japanese culture wedding guests are thought to bring luck with them for the bride and groom and thus should be given a gift (favor) in return.  I doubt that a charitable donation as a wedding favor would be deemed an appropriate gift in the Japanese culture.

Although it is nice to have family help plan your wedding, knowing the etiquette that governs all parts of the wedding is crucial.  It is essential that you follow proper etiquette so as not to offend any of your guests. That is why professional Los Angeles wedding planners are well versed in several cultures and their wedding traditions and etiquette.  This gives them the ability to incorporate contemporary fads with cultural wedding traditions.

I would highly recommend that your cousin consult a local Los Angeles wedding planner that can work with your family "wedding planner" to combine cultural wedding favors and etiquette with contemporary ideas.

If your cousin really likes the idea of a charitable donation party favor, I would combine it with a bag of candied almonds or chocolates.  This way the bride gets what she wants without offending her guests.