Africa's rich tribal traditions offer some of the best family-inspired wedding traditions.  In Africa, family and especially elders play a huge part in a couple's lives. Even elders who have passed are still remembered in wedding celebrations.

There are many African wedding traditions. However Tambiko and Kola nuts are two traditions that can be used in any wedding celebration.  Tambiko is a special prayer and blessing, while Kola nuts are a symbol of endurance of love.

Tambiko is an African wedding tradition that involves a libation ceremony. Alcohol or holy water is poured onto the ground.  The libation is poured in the cardinal directions and prayers are recited to the ancestral spirits. During the prayer they also recognize those who recently passed.

Traditionally one of the eldest family members says the prayer. Today the bride and groom tend to have their clergy recite the prayer during the wedding ceremony. This ceremonial prayer gives the groom and bride an opportunity to honor the elders in their family.

Tambiko (Libation prayer)

An African proverb tells us that people who lack the knowledge of their past are like a tree without roots. So, in the spirit of remembrance, we pour this libation. We pour to honor the past, so that we may learn from it. We pour to honor the importance of family. We raise our cup to God to show our reverence for the original source of our lives. We use cool water as a symbol of the continuity of life, to purify and to nourish our souls. We pour to celebrate the coming together of these two families.   It is said that through others, we are somebody. Through this marriage, we broaden our family circle, remember our heritage and recall those who gave us life. We call upon our ancestors—our mothers, grandmothers and great grandmothers, our fathers, grandfathers and our great-grandfathers, uncles, aunts and cousins – the foundations of our families, immortalized in our thoughts.  We call upon our elders, whose wisdom we seek in all endeavors. Our friends, whom we are blessed to have in our lives, our parents who guided us along the road to adulthood. We call upon family who have passed over and could not be here to day. We ask that they be with us in our thoughts. We call upon the Bride and Groom, that they may always find prosperity in love and devotion. We ask that this couple be blessed by children, because children give glory to a home.  Place your minds with those who could not be here today. Family, friends and ancestors who have passed on, are ill, or simply could not find their way here. Place your thoughts with this person or persons so that they may bear witness to this union in spirit. Therefore we cast our libation to the North, to the South, to the East and to the West. We wish everyone to leave more blessed than when they came. Amen.

Prayer taken from the Celebrant Foundation and Institute.

Kola Nuts

In Africa, the kola nut is a symbol of healing and is used for medicinal purposes. During the wedding ceremony, the bride and groom exchange kola nuts with family members and each other before they exchange their vows. This is a symbolic way of saying that they will always heal their differences and their love is greater than any hard times they might endure.

Both of these African traditions show how important family is. Most weddings are concerned only with the bride and groom. So, it is nice to stop and honor your elders and those who passed during one the most cherished days of your lives. When planning your wedding  keep these family oriented traditions in mind.

This wedding tradition was brought to you by Wedding and Party Network, your resource for wedding planning.

Ask The Celebration Advisor: [I need a ] nice way of saying "no children under 2" at wedding. ~ Karen

The Celebration Advisor: Karen, don't feel like you're stepping on toes by not inviting children to your wedding — or in this case — children of or below a certain age. It's perfectly acceptable! Traditional wedding etiquette provides a few ways to make this clarification known without hurting feelings (theirs or yours!)

First, you can put only the names of the parents on the outer and inner envelope of the wedding invitation. This exclusion of "and family" or the child's name should be understood as "no young children allowed." It is highly inappropriate to put "no children" on the invitations. Some may not be as familiar with wedding invitation etiquette. If you get a call saying "we're bringing our children too", explain the situation at that point.

Though it is not appropriate to state this on the invitation according to traditional wedding etiquette, it is acceptable to include a small note (much like you would include a map with the reception invitation) that briefly explains that there is an age limit for the children in attendance.

If you want the parents of young children to come but don't want their children in the actual ceremony or reception, consider providing guests with the names and numbers of local babysitters. Another option is to provide a nursery with babysitters for the duration of the ceremony. If the parents want to attend the reception, they may have to hire a sitter of their own. Depending upon the ceremony location, this can be a agreat alternative that still provides an age limit for the children at your wedding but doesn't put a crimp on your guest list.