Ask The Celebration Advisor: I am the Mistress of Ceremonies at an upcoming wedding, and I am having trouble finding the “proper” etiquette for seating a grandfather (grandmother not living). The bride want’s the other grandmother ushered in with her husband following; but in the case where there is just a grandfather and no grandmother, how does that work? Does he just follow the first set of grandparents down the aisle, or what? ~ Suzanne C.
The Celebration Advisor: Suzanne, this is (as you know) a rather interesting situation. In Christian ceremonies (different for Judaic), grandparents tend to be seated just before the processional begins. To ease the bride’s concern, here are “proper” wedding etiquette options for seating her grandfather.
**Since the bride’s grandmother will not be ushered by her husband, it is perfectly acceptable to have the single grandfather follow the others down the aisle. This will typically be the most acceptable and best regarded option.
**If the bride’s grandmother and grandfather were to walk together, the bride should ask someone to usher her single grandfather. This could be a female family member not in the wedding party (an aunt, a close cousin, etc.). It should never be a member of the wedding party as this would cause them to have “double duty”. Her grandfather may request to walk alone but the option should be provided just in case.
**Though it is less traditional to have a man walk first, you could seat the single grandfather first if he is the father of the mother of the bride. The matriarchal lineage dictates the order of the wedding processional, especially seating grandparents and stepparents. Even if his wife has passed, her grandfather may be seated before the set of grandparents. Again, this is a less traditional processional and should only be used if the grandfather or the bride is sensitive to having him walk alone.
My daughter’s fiance has one grandmother from his mother’side and one grandfather from his father’s side….how do we handle seating the grandfather? Should he just be in the pew or should he be seated formally like the grandmother?
Consistency is the key. If the grandparents on the bride’s side and the grandmother on the groom’s are formally seated, then the groom’s grandfather needs to be formally seated. The usher will simply walk beside the grandfather and direct him to the pew.
My grand daugher is getting married. The brides mothers’ parents are sitting at the main table I am being put a tanother table is this normal for the grandparent???
Hi Arch,
There are several different ways to do the seating at the reception. Are both sets of parents being seated at the main table? If so, and since the other grandparents are being seated at the main table, traditionally you would also be seated at the main table. Sometimes a separate table is created for the “host” of the wedding, which would be the bride’s parents. In this case, the grandparents would likely be seated at this table. I would talk to your granddaughter and let her know your concerns. Hope this helps!