You and your fiancé may be formulating your guest list when the topic of whether or not you should invite your exes to the wedding comes up. Now, these are some rough waters to get through, but we have come up with a few tips on how to know which exes are given the green light to come to the wedding and which ones you should really forget about.
How long were you with them?
We don’t mean “how long was your relatonship?” here. How long were you intimate with this person? Someone you gave a kiss on the cheek to as a kid versus someone you were intimate with for a long time are two different things. If it is the latter, just don’t even consider it.
Who are they?
Did you invest a lot of time with this person? Could you foresee your heartstrings being tugged just a bit if they walked through the door? Or, were they just someone you had a brief connection with but stayed in contact platonically without a thought of romance? Considering these questions will help you determine whther or not it’s a good idea to invite them. You’ll want to evaluate how they have played a role in your life, and what they mean to you in the future. If you are “just friends,” then that should be okay; but if they are a potenial “more than friends,” then you may have to talk with your fiancé.
What is your future spouse saying?
This may be the first thing to consider, but if your future spouse has an issue with this person or persons, then it’s probably a good idea that you don’t even consider inviting the exes. See your marriage as a fresh start and the beginning of a beautiful journey. Marriage is hard enough, and there’s no need to start it off with problems by adding other people that could hurt your future spouse.
Who ended it with who?
Did they break your heart to the point you didn’t think you would find someone else? Are you still emotionally attached to them in some small way? If you are even checking their social media every once and awhile, then it’s probably a good idea that you don’t invite them to the wedding.
Can you be happy for them?
Jealousy plays a significant role in figuring out if you are okay with this person coming to the wedding. Are you going to be okay seeing them flirt with other people at the wedding? Will you be okay if they brought a plus-one? If you think you couldn’t keep your cool or be happy for them, then you definitely do not want to invite them.
At the end of the day, it’s all about being smart with who you invite to your wedding. Emotions are going to be extremely high, and you don’t need the added stress of a crazy ex to ruin you or your fiancé’s day. So when it comes to inviting an ex, do so with caution.
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